Rachel K. Rachel

Gasp! There has been murder done at the Pike Place Market! Well, attempted murder. Of a PIGGY BANK.

Rachel the Piggy Bank at the Pike Place Market

The story is best explained in an article by Maureen O'Hagan in today's Seattle Times.

Market pig vs. Prius: And the winner is?

Maureen O'Hagan

Pig VS Prius

The time: the wee hours, Saturday.

The place: Pike Place Market.

The matchup: pig-versus-Prius.

The pig weighed in at about 550 pounds. The Prius a whole lot more.

And the winner? The pig, by a squeal.

According to James Haydu, a spokesman for the market, the battle was over in seconds.

The way the police told Haydu the story, a taxicab was waiting for the light to change at the corner of First Avenue and Pike Street when it was rear-ended by another vehicle. The force sent the taxi careening.

"The driver of the cab panicked and, for whatever reason, turned left into Pike Place Market," Haydu said. The taxi, a Prius, hit the pig.

The Prius was pretty beat up. The pig, known as Rachel, survived. She was down but not out.

The force pulled Rachel's feet from the cement that held her.

After the accident, two construction workers came by, hoisted her onto a dolly, and wheeled her into storage.

"She'll be up and running once we can pour new cement," Haydu said. Well, maybe not running, exactly, but you get the drift. She'll be back in her spot as the Market mascot soon.

And the cabbie? According to Haydu, he was taken to the hospital, treated and released.

Yes, it's true. Rachel the piggy bank in the Pike Place Market survived her attempted assassination by an ill-tempered Prius cab. (Yes, Seattle has hybrid cabs. ) Kevin and I discovered this while brunching at the Pike Place Grill, which has a great view of Rachel usually. We took these photos following our feast of eggs benedict and chili cheese omelette. 

"Taking a sick day -- Will be back to help the market's seniors and kids. Th-Oinks."

"We miss you, Rachel! Get well soon."

I have doubt over the events of this Prius accident. The distance from the traffic intersection at 1st Ave & Pike St. is at least 60 feet away from the brass pig. How fast was this alleged rear ender going? Do Prius breaks actually cause the vehicle to accelerate in ridiculous directions? I call shennanigans on the whole thing. Perhaps it is all a conspiracy, wrought with mystery and secret sausage. Secrets sausage? Yes. 

THE MOST SECRET SAUSAGE.

Rachel K. Orientation

This evening I went to the Seattle University Master in Teaching Program Orientation. It was my first opportunity to meet the 49 other lucky ducks that I will be going to school with. These are the people I will be drinking wine with. The people I will be borrowing pencils from. The people whom I will be sabotaging for future job openings.

There were a lot of left-handed folks, which made me feel instantly at home. I met a nice girl named Crystal, who had the blingiest engagement ring I ever did see. She told me that she had actually deferred from the fall program so that she could get married. I replied in turn that I would rather go through grad school twice than plan a wedding.

I also met a fellow southpaw named Jim-Jiminy, who wants to teach the same grades (3-6) as I do! Huzzah! Surely Jim and I will be capital chums in no time.

Before the orientation began, we played a "get to know you" game in which we had to find people who met credentials on a piece of paper.

I say, have you climbed a mountain? No? How about.... have you ever been to Egypt? Yes? Prodigious! Do tell me your name, as you have done me this kindness.

 It was a great opportunity to meet some of the 50 colleagues, and I even met a few girls who share a neighborhood with me. One of them has a car.... 

As our orientation began, we heard from two notable people. The first, Madam M., spoke to us about the program itself, answering each question with an indelible smile. The program will be challenging, but the professors I've met seem quite capable and all of the advanced readings were given out to us, so at least there is the opportunity for preparation.

After a short recess of cookies and lemonade, we returned to our seats and heard about the "field" from Captain G, as I will refer to him. His aim was to explain to us how he places us and what he tries to take into consideration, such as geography. He is undoubtedly a veteran, and I think myself lucky to have him on my side.

SU is known for having the highest success rate in teacher placements in the state, at least in 2007. Hopefully with my dashing good looks and first rate resume, I too will reap the  benefits of a meager salary and classroom full of spitballers. It is the dream.

For the rest of February I will be working on my independent studies, which include economics and life science for elementary school teachers. I hope to spend a great deal of time in the SU library, which I haven't visited yet. However, an impending sore throat may cause an untimely delay in this. I will continue to drink tea and stay vigilant.

NB: All names have been changed as I was warned about the consequences of having social media available to the public. Names have been changed to protect the innocent. And for funsies.

Rachel K. FAFSA

I went to visit my family's home in Virginia after University of Washington classes were finished and my math course at Seattle Central was completed. I got straight As! This is equally exciting as it has been in the past. I wear my Hermione Granger badge proudly.

While home, I talked to my parents about the troubles I was having making a decision over which school to attend. My parents told me that I should choose the school with the better reputation. But they BOTH have great reputations! Finally, after sleeping on it for the maximum time allotted, I decided to join the ranks of the Redhawks and send $500 to Seattle University.

The decision felt right enough, although I almost always have "buyer's regret," as some call it. In the end, I liked the idea of being in and out of a program quickly and getting out into the job market. I'm ready to DO things, and I don't want to waste any more time.

I returned to Seattle with a decision made, and promptly canceled all of the classes I had worked so hard to enroll in. The refunds of thousands of dollars made me feel better and better about my SU decision.

Now that I am all signed up for SU and they have received my generous and non-refundable donation of a few hundred smack-a-roos, it is time to get busy for an ACTUAL program, rather than getting busy on preparations for an actual program. I feel like I've leveled up!

Paperwork came and was filled out, an online portal account was registered for, and the last thing to do before starting classes in March was to apply for financial aid and get some money wired into my account (like magic.)

Of course, I had no idea how to go about getting money in my account. I knew that the money would appear and that they would expect me to pay it all back at some point, but I wasn't certain of any of those important application steps. So, I spent most of January looking into finances, which are my least favorite things to look into.

1. Head to www.fafasa.gov -- NOT -- fafsa.com, which is the same thing, except they ask you to pay $60 instead of $0. Shame on you, fafsa.com. In fact, FAFSA stands for the "FREE application for federal student aid." 
2. Start filling out the 2011-2012 FAFSA. 
3. Panic when the webpage prompts me for my 2010 tax information, which I do not have. 
4. Head to Seattle University's student services center and talk to a nice man who knows many things about FAFSA.
5. Become informed that I need to fill out the 2010-2011 FAFSA, not the 2011-2012 FAFSA. 
6. Panic because I do not have my tax records for 2009, which I now need. 
7. Contact IRS and have free 1040 transcripts sent to my house (it is extremely easy and I will link to it here in case anyone else has this issue.)
8. Receive 2009 tax transcripts and do a dance for joy.
9. Get back on fafsa.gov to fill out my 2010-2011 FAFSA. 
10. Realize that by entering my SSN and TIN that the FAFSA.gov website already has my tax information from 2009 and I didn't need to request a transcript in the first place. 
11. Face palm.
12. Fill out FAFSA. 

I imagine these 12 steps would be abridged to 3 simple steps if one is good at reading directions, which I am clearly not.

In any case, I am now able to borrow thousands of dollars from Uncle Sam for my first quarter of school, and will be able to borrow thousands more for the 2011-2012 school year soon.

And that is how I learned how to set myself up to owe thousands of dollars in 12 simple steps!

Rachel K. Decision

Seattle University wants me, too! Who would have thought this would happen? Certainly not me. In my infinite self-doubt, I seem to have forgotten somewhere along the graduate school application process to ... y'know... compare schools. My  preliminary search process for masters in teaching programs was as follows:

1. Google "masters in teaching programs, Seattle." 
2. Apply to top 3 search results. 
3. Pour a glass of wine. 

And in fact, the google search is really no exaggeration of my "research efforts." Behold: 

And so I began applying to these programs. Or, I should say that I applied to the programs that weren't turbo sketchy. I haven't talked very much about Seattle Pacific University, but that's only because the application deadline is in February and by the time I was getting around to putting something together, I had already heard back from the University of Washington. 

So now I am accepted to two ostensibly good schools: The University of Washington and Seattle University. I have the greatest problem anyone could have: 

Which graduate program should I go to?

 Sure, UW was definitely my first choice and I was totally behind the idea of finishing up pre-requisite classes in the next two quarters and starting in June... but then I got into the other school! It changed everything! So, I started making lists  -- most of them in my head at around 2am -- and here is what my lists may have looked like were they written on paper:

VS

UW v. SU 

UW has a bigger fountain than SU's... plus it has a vista of a volcano. 

SU's bathrooms are much nicer than UW's

UW has 220 people in the MIT program while SU's has 50

UW is broke and SU is backed by the DARK SIDE Catholic Church and has church $$$

UW is 2 years long, SU is 1

UW would save me $3,000... which I would end up spending on pre-requisites

I don't have to take anymore prerequisites if I go to SU... I could just take them during the program as opposed to before. 

For these reasons and generally no others, I have decided to officially enroll in the Seattle University and start my Masters in Teaching Program in early March of 2011. This is barring amnesia, peg-leggedness, and/or cold feet. 

So -- exciting news! This blog might actually turn into a teaching blog after a solid year and some months as a bunch of mild catastrophes. 

I'm going to be SO BROKE. 

And on that note, I'm going to visit my family in Virginia for a week and a half or so. I will probably report more on the graduate school enrollment from there. 

Rachel K. UW & the Return of Lifeapocalypse

The news that I had been accepted to the University of Washington Masters in Teaching Program came over my iPod e-mail around 4:30pm while I was in the middle of a closing shift at Makeda Coffee. I was so stunned that I had to read it over about three times (iPod screens are very small). Finally I was convinced enough to tell my boss the good news, which she was excited to hear! 

I spent the rest of the shift texting and calling people between customers and then excitedly bounded down to Capitol Hill to tell Kevin the good news in PERSON and to go see a midnight showing of "Indiana Jones: The Temple of Doom," which is the silliest Indiana Jones movie ever. So many alligators. 

I spent that weekend feeling very excited because THE THINGS I HAVE BEEN WORKING FOR ARE NOW LEADING TO SOMETHING FRUITFUL! SO FULL OF FRUIT ARE THEY! 

Then again, I have three more prerequisite courses that I need to sign up for, get into, and get B's in before I can go to this masters program. Rats. 

So, Lifeapocalypse returns in a new form. I managed to register for a US History class (Reconstruction and onwards,) but I have yet to be fully enrolled in the educational psychology or multi ethnic studies courses that I need to secure my place at UW in June. Basically I've earned the acceptance, but I'm not yet accepted... which is really stressful. 

I've spent the past week trying to feel happy, but mostly feeling inundated and worried about courses. I'm waitlisted for these classes at UW, but I won't know if I have a seat in them until the first week of classes (January 3rd, which is 4 days before my reply to UW is due.) I have tried unsuccessfully to enroll in the community college lifespan psych course, but the professor wouldn't let me on the wait list without Psych 101 under my belt... even though the psych class is a 200 level (really?) 

The Plan B is going to happen as soon as I have a few hours to bus it up to North Seattle Community College to try and appeal to the psych professors up there to let me into their classes. 

Nothing is easy, everything is still up in the air, and I know I should stop worrying and remember to celebrate this incredibly VICTORY that my hard work has finally paid off with. I'm hoping that the classes will all work out and I can start blogging about REAL TEACHER THINGS and not DEEPLY ROOTED NON-MATRICULATED ANXIETY. 

I should hear back from Seattle University in a few more weeks. I interviewed with them awhile ago, but forgot to write about it. All in all it was pretty unspectacular. I really liked the UW candidates in the group interview a lot better, which is something to consider if I end up having to decide between the programs. 

I hope my next blog post is an optimistic and cheery one!